Many Moons Ago...

Many moons ago I wrote this email with my friend Lisa, one night when we were PMS'ing and we wanted to vent about the difference between men, and women, and how they miss their significant others. These are our findings. Women will find it hillarious, and men will find it to be reflective.. or, perhaps maybe they will understand their girlfriends better....

Okay so I am sitting here talking with Lisa about how women and men are soo different because when you guys fuck off doing your own thing, and we fuck off doing our own thing, the only thing on our minds is your stupid asses, meanwhile, you all are our fuckin around and not even giving a thought to us.. or at least not as frequently as we are thinking of you. And thats all cuz of our damn chemical make up and the fact that we need you more than you need us, unless your mother never taught you to do laundry or dishes. And this, my sweetest boyfriend ever! is sooo pathetic!

Why do we insist on being so damn dependant in an "im soo independant" way? I mean really, who are we fooling? Not you guys cuz you obviously know that we are sitting here going. gee.. i miss ____ and whining about it to our girls because this shit common knowledge... women talk about their significant other issues, and men, sit and try and ponder them like the 'the thinker' and then still don't come up with a conclusion!

Like, we could plan a vacation, but if the boyfriend wasn't coming.. we wouldnt be going because we would HATE to leave you. That is soo retarded! Like for example, you going to the bar to you, means "im going to the bar" meanwhile girls sit there and go "he is at the bar, there are single women there, that means he is with the single women, omg, crisis, i cant even pee without worrying!" and why is this? what makes men so damn special that they have this unbelievable power?

I just realized this whole email soiunds like something from Sex and the City. It obviously will have no conclusion and yet, i felt like sharing this with the opposite sex. that being you.

So, what have Lisa and I learned tonight?

1. Men are annoying cuz they don't go nearly as crazy worrying about nothing as we do. (yes, this makes no sense to you, but that is only cuz you are a guy)
2. You are always on my mind. Even in the weirdest times. And I know, that I am not always on your mind, but once again, this is the difference between male and female. it doesnt mean you don't love me, it just means you are 'male"
3. Estrogen sucks. And here us women are taking estrogen to prevent birth. Good idea, must have been a mans.
4. I love you. Even though you annoy me because I love you. Its one of those pms-y you can't win arguements.
5. This email was only for educational purposes. This probably should be shared with other men, but we would rather you not. This is our own psychological findings, let them find out from the girlfriends who miss them
6. No, I haven't gone crazy, I just realized the science of Mars and Venus... hey.. its 3:19am is Oprah on?
7. Men hate Oprah cuz Oprah gives women the thoughts Lisa and I have just re-formulated. And she gives us big words like "re-formulated"
8. When you have lack of man - your sense of humor comes back with a vengence. You no longer are annoyed by little bugs.
9. I still miss you, which says, that I have learned NOTHING at all from this evening.

With our thoughts.. as usual.

P.S. Thou hast no fury like a womans scorn. What does that mean? Don't piss us off.. you will live to regret it.

See? That is what PMS does to the female mind, provides illogical logic.